Chapter 5: Xie Qihua

In the summer of 2012.

Xie Qihua moved into the Li family.

At that time, she was just sixteen, having just passed the first week after her biological mother's death, and was brought to Beijing by Father Li.

The Li family was very wealthy, but Xie Qihua's family lived from hand to mouth. Her mother was Father Li's ex-wife.

It's a bit complicated, but to put it simply, Father Li was her nominal father.

But in reality, she was the child of her mother and a servant of the Li family.

When Xie Qihua was young and didn't understand much, she thought her hard life was due to not being born into a good family. Later, she realized she was actually born into the right womb, just with the wrong father. If her father had been Father Li, there would have been no issues, but since he wasn't, things got complicated, and her mother was driven out of the house.

After Xie Qihua grew up, she started questioning her mother: "Why did you have to mess around with someone else!"

Xie Qihua's mother, Xie Xue, was preparing for an audition, holding a cigarette and smiling: "He was handsome."

Being handsome, what good is that? It doesn't put food on the table. Xie Xue was so beautiful, but without Father Li's bank card, she went from being a wealthy lady back to a small-time actress.

However, Xie Qihua didn't hold much resentment towards Father Li. His wife had a child with someone else, yet he not only helped cover up the scandal but also sent monthly alimony, which was quite decent of him.

Actually, Father Li originally sent money once a year, but then Xie Qihua couldn't afford her tuition because Xie Xue would spend the money on designer bags and clothes. One year, when Xie Xue was in a dry spell and couldn't earn money, Xie Qihua even had to drop out of school. Later, Father Li started sending tuition monthly, letting Xie Qihua manage it herself.

Xie Qihua had a good relationship with Father Li, probably because he only had two sons and no daughters. Father Li would visit Hancheng a few times a year, either for business or just to see her, only her, without meeting Xie Xue. However, he would ask about Xie Xue's affairs, like if she had taken on bad roles, gotten a new boyfriend, maxed out her credit cards, or if she had been coughing at night recently. Xie Qihua would tell him the truth, and Father Li would touch her forehead.

Just as Xie Qihua had a good relationship with Father Li, she also had a good relationship with Xie Xue. They didn't seem like mother and daughter but more like tenants living under the same roof. Xie Qihua learned to cook before she even started elementary school, and as soon as she learned arithmetic, she took over the household accounts. Xie Xue never asked about Xie Qihua's studies or life, unlike Father Li.

"Your mother is quite cold," was Father Li's way of putting it. Xie Qihua thought it was okay; Xie Xue had taken care of her, changing her diapers when she was two or three and still wetting the bed. Xie Xue also attended her parent-teacher meetings and even went to school to make a scene when Xie Qihua was bullied.

At that time, Xie Qihua didn't realize that she thought Xie Xue was a good mother because she herself was quite cold.

This term made people seem heartless.

Unlike Father Li's lingering affection when talking about Xie Xue, Xie Xue had long forgotten about this man. A beautiful woman with a bit of a longing for freedom, she could make the men around her drunk without drinking just by sitting at the bar and ordering the cheapest drink.

Xie Xue never lacked boyfriends after her divorce.

Though she never brought them home.

Xie Xue's accident was sudden, a car crash.

She didn't die in vain; her young boyfriend protected her until the end. Xie Qihua was already sixteen, not an age where she understood nothing, so of course, she was too embarrassed to tell Father Li, but he found out from the police.

It was also because Xie Qihua had grown up a lot that Father Li could share more heartfelt words with her.

"Your mother was like that," he said, "she was loved wherever she went, she had a good life."

A woman with a good life, but who died young. Xie Qihua couldn't agree, and she had been observing people's expressions since she was very young. Father Li could say such things, probably because his current family life wasn't happy. Later, when she moved into the Li family, Xie Qihua found her guess was correct. Father Li and Li's mother had a business marriage, and he remarried less than a month after divorcing Xie Xue. The speed was so fast, and since they weren't a couple with feelings, Xie Qihua still suspects that Father Li wanted to retaliate against Xie Xue. Anyway, since Xie Xue is dead, there's no way to verify.

Regardless, Father Li was quite good to her.

That's why Xie Qihua was willing to move from Wuhan to Beijing.

The Li family in the capital had two sons.

The elder was twelve, and the younger was eight.

Xie Qihua was only sixteen at the time. They say there's a generation gap every three years, so there was one between her and Li Jinlan, and two between her and Li Pingxi.

She still remembers the first time she met these two brothers, in the piano room. They were wearing white shirts and trousers, both looking like little adults, with a teacher guiding them in playing the piano. Xie Qihua followed Father Li, who knocked on the door, entered, and introduced her, first explaining Xie Qihua's identity.

The younger brother, Li Pingxi, looked at her curiously, while the elder brother, Li Jinlan, looked at her with a cold and disdainful expression.

Xie Qihua was very perceptive; with just one look, she could tell that the two brothers weren't living happily either.

There are very few children in the world who truly lack love.

And children who lack love have their own reasons.

In the Li family, Xie Qihua most often dealt with Li's mother. She was a full-time housewife, managing the vast household affairs. To be honest, Xie Qihua found it quite cruel. Li's mother was also very beautiful and relatively young despite having two sons. Why did she confine herself to this hall? If Xie Xue chose to be unconventional for this reason, Xie Qihua could understand and deeply support her.

Xie Qihua didn't see the two brothers often as she went to and from school. As her horizons broadened, her late returns became more frequent. Sometimes she even arrived home at the same time as Father Li after he finished work. During that period, Xie Qihua loved night outings, not going home after evening self-study but wandering the streets. Father Li didn't scold her, saying she was very much like her mother. They would sit in the living room with only one light on and chat.

Father Li wasn't much of a talker at home, but he had some things he could say to Xie Qihua.

From this, Xie Qihua felt that Father Li didn't actually like this family.

Whether he talked about past events, judged his ex-wife, or cared for Xie Qihua.

Xie Qihua wasn't his child, had no blood relation, but she felt paternal love from Father Li.

As for Li's mother, along with the children around her, they were all very polite to Xie Qihua. Xie Qihua felt that the two brothers disliked her, but to what extent, it was hard to say. She only remembered one year when Li Pingxi went to Happy Valley for his birthday, and Li's mother took her along.

The two boys were playing bumper cars, and Li's mother was eagerly watching from outside the fence. Xie Qihua was already seventeen, not a child, and didn't want to play, so she stayed by Li's mother's side.

"I used to be a racer," Li's mother said, "before I got married."

Xie Qihua didn't expect such a gentle and elegant woman to have this side. It turned out Li's mother wasn't eagerly watching the children but the bumper cars that resembled racing cars.

Everyone has ideals. To put it grandly, something they're willing to dedicate their life to; more simply, something they've always wanted to do. Xie Qihua didn't have such a thing. Her Chinese teacher at school said she lacked ambition, and Xie Qihua thought it was a poor person's disease. How could one's spirit be rich when materially deprived? Only the upper class has the time, money, and energy to vent their unplaced talents.

"...Then why didn't you continue?" Xie Qihua asked. Actually, she knew why, but in Li's mother's eyes, she was just a child, and children should ask such questions. Li's mother indeed opened up, talking a lot about her experiences after marrying into the Li family.

Finally, Li's mother summed it up with "Love is a shackle." See, it was about marriage, but she spoke of love. Xie Qihua realized that marriage and love aren't so easily separated, not everyone is as cold as her and Xie Xue. Li's mother did have love for Father Li.

Some things bound by blood are too heavy.

With these, how could there be no love?

But is there no love for those without blood relations?

Xie Qihua thought it was hard to say, Father Li was quite good to her.

Father Li and Li's mother didn't go on business trips together often, but there were always a few times a year. They went to the US to visit relatives, Xie Qihua didn't know if they were foreigners, but judging from Li Jinlan and Li Pingxi's bone structure, they were quite handsome, with Chinese features.

When the parents were away, the kids were in charge. That night, Xie Qihua found mud on her bedsheets.

The children's rooms were all on the second floor, she hadn't been to the brothers' rooms, but that didn't mean they wouldn't visit hers.

"Who did this?!" Xie Qihua grabbed the quilt and went downstairs.

The tutor was doing evening reading with Li Jinlan and Li Pingxi.

Li Pingxi shivered, and Li Jinlan reached out to protect him.

The nanny quickly came to mediate, saying to just change to a clean set, and told Xie Qihua not to be angry. Telling someone not to be angry when they're angry, where's the logic in that? If someone's hungry, do you tell them not to be hungry? Xie Qihua didn't know how to deal with upper-class people, but that didn't mean she was a pushover. She turned to get a quilt from Li Pingxi's room, and Li Pingxi went upstairs to stop her.

Li Jinlan suddenly spoke.

"...I did it."

Ten-year-old Li Pingxi loved his quilt, it had a Crayon Shin-chan design. Li Jinlan knew this, so he said that. Xie Qihua didn't care about their brotherly bond, rolled up Li Pingxi's quilt with one arm, and then went to Li Jinlan's room. Both were stunned.

"You! You're cheating!" Li Pingxi shouted, "I messed up your quilt, and you took both of ours..."

"You," Xie Qihua pointed at his nose, "your quilt is because of what you did." Then she pointed at Li Jinlan's nose, "your quilt is because you were just standing by and watching, you think I didn't know? You two always do things together, don't you?"

Li Jinlan was silent, Xie Qihua was right.

Xie Qihua threw all three quilts into the backyard pond.

"If that's the case, then no one sleeps."

Li Pingxi cried, "Why do you get to do that?!"

"Because I'm eight years older than you," Xie Qihua coldly crossed her arms, "When I was doing bad things, you were still playing with mud."

"You... what's so great about being older!" Li Pingxi was crying, "The nanny said, you're not even part of our family!"

The nannies in the house were momentarily silenced.

Li Jinlan instinctively shielded his brother.

Xie Qihua pushed Li Jinlan aside and grabbed Li Pingxi by the collar.

She hadn't intended to be rough with him, but Li Pingxi sobbed and said:

"You... you dare hit me... I'll have my dad kick you out..."

Xie Qihua slapped him to the ground.

It was too fast, no one had time to react.

"You think I'm comfortable staying here?!" Xie Qihua spat at him viciously, "You better have your dad kick me out! I'd be delighted! Call him if you want, complain all you want, when they get back from their trip, you can complain however you want!"

"But before that..." she glared at Li Jinlan, "you better keep your brother in check!"

Xie Qihua grabbed her coat and strode out of the house.

No one in the large house dared to stop her.

Xie Qihua had money, given by Father Li, and she had also earned some over the past two years. During the summer vacation of her second year of high school, she spent a month learning to drive, and as soon as she graduated, she bought a hybrid car for just over a hundred thousand. She had her own car, could go wherever she wanted, and no one could control her.

Why did Xie Qihua make so many plans for herself?

Because she never considered these people as family.

She went to stay at a friend's house, calculating when Father Li and Li's mother would return from their trip. If she was kicked out of the Li family, she would simply return to Hancheng. Xie Xue had left her an old house, and she could earn her own tuition during university... after all, one can't starve to death.

But Xie Qihua didn't wait for Father Li and Li's mother to come home.

Only for the news of their death.